Forever a Flame, a Burning Desire
by Scarlettarose
Summary: This story takes place after Peeta and Katniss win the 74th Hunger Games. This is told in the way I wanted it to be with more in store. UPDATE: it will have more of a romance story through Catching Fire and Mockingjay. Rated M much later for Everlark. It's my first fanfic!
1. Chapter 1

**_Author's note: Hi everyone. Before you start to read my story, I wanted you all to know that this is my first time ever writing a story. I feel in love recently with The Hunger Games trilogy and seen the first movie over and over again. I decided to start writing due to one of my inspirations, Puppylov40. Thanks to you, this probably wouldn't be possible. So thank you._**

**_This story is takes place after Peeta and Katniss got out of the arena in the 74th Hunger Games. It's basically how I wanted to it be. Other than that, that is all I have. This is also rated M because I don't know what's in store for Everlark._**

**_As to my fellow readers, thank you for taking the time to read it. Please bare with me because I have no idea where this is headed. So please no hating reviews, and if there happens to be bad reviews...I'll deal with them later._**

**_Disclaimer: I do not own anything. All the characters belong to Suzanne Collins._**

**_R&R Enjoy!_**

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"Let me in!" I'm yelling and grasping for air as I'm hitting my right side of my fist against the clear crystal glass, trying to get their attention. I repeat this over and over and I know I've failed. Hot tears are streaming down my face as I allow myself to slide down to the ground. The doctors are huddled around Peeta working frantically on bringing him back to health. So many machines are hooked up to him, wires everywhere over his lifeless body. All I can do is stare. They don't even hint of noticing me.

_What if he doesn't make it?_ I for sure won't be able to live with myself if he doesn't. I should have killed him when I had the chance before I pulled out the nightlock berries. He begged me to take his life and told me there wouldn't be anything left for him if he returned instead of me. I was his true love since we were children he had told me in the cave, again confessing his love for me by the Cornucopia. I was unsure of what to say at those moments, knowing I didn't respond the way I should have, but now... now I was wishing I had responded more in a way that made him believe I was in love with him just as he was with me instead of telling myself to act for the games to survive. Now I won't ever get the chance to tell him if he ends up dead with Capital doctors that President Snow might have ordered to finish him off if they were so desperate to have one winner from the beginning. It would be simpler that way, wouldn't it? To get rid of the one that's already lost too much blood and the one who had only a few deep scratches. Why waste their time?

Before I know it the doctors and Peeta are gone. A light brighter than the sun appeared and I began to panic. Heels click on the floor hurriedly as I try to make myself stand. My legs are too shaky, making me unable to stand. The clicking heels get louder and louder and suddenly two guards appear behind me and lift me up, both having a grip of my arms. I felt rage rise in my body and started to fight back. Then the woman who I mistakably thought was Effie stabs me with a needle, feeling something enter my system and just like that, I black out.

I'm barley conscious. I feel like I'm floating, but a man in a white uniform is carrying me. I'm placed on a metal table and I feel a few stings in my arm. They must be giving me a shot of some sort. A woman is changing my clothes into a gown as the other people around must be bringing medical supplies over. My body responds to the actions the woman is wanting me to take as she is changing me. I'm then laid back down. I try to open my eyes, but the bright light above makes me shut them again. I can barley hear what they are saying. They are whispering so low or maybe it's because I'm about to fall asleep. _No. I mustn't fall asleep._ I need to know what they are going to do to me. _What if they try to kill me instead? Or kill us both. Who knows what they did with Peeta._

A mask like thing is brought over and now covers my mouth and nose. I can still breathe okay. I feel something cold on my chest and take note of the machines beeping next to me. I feel another couple of stings in my arm and then my eyes finally close and I'm pulled into darkness.

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**_Let me know what you all think. Next update should be over the weekend, if not then early week day :) Thanks!_**


	2. Chapter 2

**_Disclaimer: I do not own anything. All of the characters belong to Suzanne Collins._**

**_Author's note: I'm sorry that it had been more than a few days. I know it's late week when I said I'd post the next chapter earlier. Just like everyone here, I have been busy with finals and I thought, honestly, I would be just fine and would have time, but that's proven differently. I'm sorry of this chapter is bad or that you aren't impressed. I promise things will pick up soon. Christmas Break is just about here and that means a few chapters will be updated periodically. All in good time, of course._**

**_Update: I'm sorry. Thanks to Puppylov40, she has kindly told me about my little errors. And here's a shout out to you my friend, without you this wouldn't be near possible. Thank you for your kindness and believing in me! You're the best!_**

**_Please R&R and enjoy!_**

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I wake up to a freezing room. I realize that only a blanket and bedding covers me. I try to sit up, but restraining bands are around my waist, legs, wrists. I'm trying to wiggle free and calling for someone to release me, but the room is empty. Suddenly a figure comes through the door quickly and shuts it again. "What's going on?" I ask as I raise my head. No answer. "Hey! I'm talking to you! What's goin-" and yet again, I black out.

I dream a lot. I don't know why. I dream of my father taking me out into the woods and teaching me how to hunt for the first time with my first and only bow. Then my dream leads to me where my father is teaching Prim and I the Hanging Tree song in the meadow. Our father leads us back home and then that's when I'm watching myself volunteering for Prim when she was reaped. Prim was screaming and Gale carried her away to our mother. I told myself not to cry, but watching myself now, how could I not. No one was watching me. As I began to let the tears fall I hear a girl scream. _Prim. _"Katniss, help me!" she yells again for help. _It's Rue._ I am running without thinking into a wood land area. She never made that fire and I know what's about to happen and I can't stop it. I can't stop anything. Rue is stabbed and I shoot my arrow at the enemy. Rue is dying in my arms and I sing to her. She reminded me so much like Prim. Too young and innocent to be apart of these games. I am then transferred to the Cornucopia where Peeta is in Cato's lock. He's about to kill him and I shoot my arrow too late, still hitting his hand where Peeta marked, and both Cato and Peeta fall and the mutts are killing them. I scream and cry Peeta's name. There's nothing I can do as I watch the mutts tear them to pieces. I can't stop this even if I try. I kill the mutts one by one, wasting all my arrows. A cannon goes off and I know that Cato is dead, but Peeta is barely breathing. He barely has a chance to live, and we still have a chance at winning. Both of us are from the same district survived and Seneca Crane's voice then tells us only one can win. I hear a cannon go off and Peeta is dead in my arms.

I can't seem to wake up from my dream. I know I'm screaming and I'm not conscious. I can't force myself to wake up either. I'm stuck staring at Peeta's dead body and listening to the crowd cheering as I am the winner of the 74th Hunger Games. No berries, no nothing. Maybe this is how it should have ended. _No._

I awake, breathing heavily. I can't move my arms to wipe the tears that were on my cheeks. Still there is no one around. I can barely keep a straight thought. The lights are bright in the room and I feel dizzy and surely enough I know I am about to fall back into a sleep. I try to keep myself awake, but I fall back under. I dream more peaceful this time. It's Gale and I spending time in the woods when we first met, how he kept calling me Catnip instead of Katniss. Every reaping day we would have a little feast and hope we wouldn't be picked. Wishing we could get away from it all. It seems too short and I don't want these happy moments to end, but sadly they do.

I finally wake again to the smell of food. My stomach starts to rumble. I don't know how long it has been since I've last ate. I'd assume the night before the ending of the games. I'm able to move my body more freely than before. No more restraints. A gown is the only thing covering my body. The meal must be coming from another room with no table or anything around.

I look around again and at my feet lay some clothing. Finally something normal. Or not. It's what I wore for the arena. Cinna told me that it would keep me warm and expect cold nights, which he was right. Then I know my team barely prettied me up that morning. _My team! _I've missed them so much, surprisingly. Being able to see Haymitch and Effie again filled me with happiness. And then Peeta. How will I face him? My heart stopped. I was barley able to breathe. _Is he okay? Did he make it? Would he be in the next room? _I have to know how he is. Images flashed in my head at how I last saw him, lying limp on the medical bed. Weak and unmoving. _Peeta._

I jumped out of the bed and got dressed under a few seconds. I tied my shoes and walked over to the wall like door. This was it. To face whatever happened next. Forget about home. Home wouldn't be home if Peeta wasn't around. I pushed the door slightly and it slid open.

"Peeta!" I call out.

"Katniss!" Someone called out. It wasn't him. _Where is he? _"Katniss," the woman called out again. It was Effie. I start running down the hallway into the opening main room. All I see is Effie, Haymitch, and Cinna. Portia is nowhere to be found. I find myself in Haymitch's arms, telling me nice job, sweetheart with a smile. He smells of whisky which normally I would find disgusting, but now it is comforting. _Peeta_. He's not here.

"Where's Peeta?" I cry out. Tears are about to fall down my face as I'm trying to stay strong for the news.

"Calm down, Sweetheart. He's doing just fine. He's alive; barely came through, but the kid made it." _He's alive. Oh thank god._ I pull away from Haymitch and wipe my two tears from my face.

"Where is he at? Can I see him?" I asked trying to get my sniffling under control.

"He's with Portia, getting ready for tonight's interview. That's when you'll see him. They wanted to capture your reunion live tonight in all hopes of waking up today and thank goodness you did! That would be a disaster if you didn't! It's been four days!" Effie exclaims. Her outfit is still ridiculous as usual, still I'm happy to be around her again even though I really didn't appreciate her presence from the beginning, but now everyone is close. It's as if we are our own little family. I give Effie a quick hug which starts making her cry.

"I've missed you," I whisper, letting her know.

"Oh Katniss! You're going to make me mess up my makeup if you keep that up!"

Next is Cinna, dressed amazing as ever who pulls me in for a quick hug as well. "I've missed you, girl on fire." I smile. "Now go and eat your dinner, no rush, but we do need to start getting you ready for tonight" Cinna smiled. _What does he has in store for tonight?_

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**_Cliffhanger! Who knows what will happen at the interview. Will Katniss tell Peeta right away of her feelings? What will happen on their way home? Let me know what you think of this chapter. Any suggestions what should happen soon or later? I'm welcoming considerations. :)  
_**

**_If any of you are traveling for Christmas, I wish you all stay safe and careful journey._**


	3. Chapter 3

**_Author's note: I'm sorry if it seems like the book. I'm just trying to get to where I want to get to. Bare with me. Thank you to my followers and favoriters and reviewers. I hope you enjoy this chapter. It's caused me a lot of trouble!_**

**_Please review! It means the world to me._**

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I head toward the dinning room. I can still see Haymitch, Effie, and Cinna sitting on the sofa talking. I can barely hear what they are saying, but a few glances from them at my direction tells me that they must be talking about me. I start to get angry, but I brush it off quickly and eat a real meal which seems like forever that I've had. There isn't much on the table which only consists of roast beef, peas, and two rolls. I drink a few glasses of water. I'm still hungry and glancing around the room I know I won't get seconds.

Haymitch enters the dinning room and carries in a slice of chocolate cake with a small piece of a strawberry on the side. "The cook decided to bring you a piece, since you were his favorite. Figured as much," he says as he sets the cake down in front of me.

I pour myself another glass of water and stare at the cake. "Thanks," I say as I began to take a bite. I look at Haymitch and the expression on his face seems to be trying to figure out what to say or how to say it. It's something serious I can tell. _Something's up._

"Spit it out. What is it?"

"You're in trouble," says Haymitch after a couple of moments.

_Oh no. What now?_ What could possibly be so bad now that I've survived the Hunger Games.

"The Capitol's furious about you and Peeta showing them up in the arena. The one thing they can't stand is being laughed at and they're the joke of Panem."

I stop eating the delicious cake at the sudden loss of appetite. "So?"

"So your only defense can be you were madly in love and you weren't responsible for your actions. Got it, sweetheart?"

"Got it. Does Peeta know about this?" I take a sip of water trying to rid the dryness in my throat at the news. _Real deep trouble._

"He's already there," he says.

"But you think I'm not?"

"Since when does it matter what I think?" he says as he begins walking away. "She's ready for you," he hollers out to Cinna I assume.

_What am I going to do now? _I've only began to feel things for Peeta, but was it just an impulse thing? Sure on the hovercraft that was taking us back to the Capital I was worried about him and wanted to tell him I felt the same way, but did I mean it? He was dying right before me. Were my true feelings coming out then? I didn't want anything to do with love, and look where it has me now. I'm afraid this is something I won't ever be able to escape.

Trying to clear my head, Cinna makes his way toward me and I see Haymitch and Effie disappear in their own directions. "Ready?" he asks with a smile.

"Ready as I'll ever be," I say with a frown. I'm not ready for this. Of course I'll see Peeta. I'm happy for that, to actually know he is okay and well, but it's the ceremony I'm not ready for. I don't want to see the recap of what I just experienced and went through to stay alive.

We head out of the hospital-like building area, and Cinna protects me from all the cameras and reporters that want information as a new Victor of the Games. We make it past them easily and go down a few more passages.

As we walk, I notice that the Training Center is to the left and it's barley lit. A few guards are guarding the area. Their reflections are painted on the huge glass windows. I get shivers and a few images flash through my mind of when all twent-four of us were once at our training stations that were meant to help us last longer than we would without these training stations. This part used to be full of people passing by and watching, but now it's empty except for the two of us passing by. The only noise is our own footsteps and the buzzing lights up above.

We then enter into an elevator that takes us to the twelfth floor where we stayed once before. Passing sections one through eleven reminds me of the dead tributes that will never return. It sickens me that it has to be this way every year.

The elevator soon opens and Flavius, Octavia, and Venia all rush over to me and hug me all at once. I'm suffocating my their tight hold, but all at once it comforts me. I'm not as happy to see them as they are to see me as I was to see Cinna. We move toward my room where I slept in waiting for the day of the games.

As my prep team gets the shower ready for me, they tell me I need to shave since there wasn't anytime for them to wax me. Thats fine by me, because I don't think I could handle any pain right now. I wash my body and shave. I notice that the scars on my body are no more from the games. Must be a good thing for me. I don't want to be reminded anymore than I have to be. As for the capital, they don't want to see their new victor scared for life from the blood bath war.

I get out and immediately my team begins to dry my hair and my body.  
They start on my nails, style my hair, and put makeup on me. All they talk about was what they did when the games were going on. They didn't care for the dying and dead, just the bloody events that took place and what they were doing at that time. It sickened me how the true way the capital is. I had an idea they didn't care, but on their views, it was worse. Only caring for their entertainment and not the dead that once lived, how special they were to the people in their lives.

Only Octavia remained while the others went to fetch Cinna. He came back with a beautiful colored yellow dress. "Still up for the 'girl on fire' thing?" I ask.

"Always," he says as he slips the gown over my head. This dress gives me a more curvy figure than I've had before. Probably to hide away the hunger from my body. It goes just above my knees and I feel somewhat uncomfortable. I never worn anything so exposing before. Sure strapless was nothing, but strapless and short? My legs are longer without heels as Flavius slips the sandals on my feet. My hair is down and in waves. I look more like a girl, so young. It's me, but isn't me at the same time as I appear to glow like a candlelight.

"One of the best yet." I smile as I look in the mirror again. Cinna smiles at another one of his beautiful pieces.

My prep team and I make our way down the elevator again and to where all the tributes had their interview before the day of the games. I am left alone in a lightly lit area while Cinna and my prep team go and change quickly into their outfits before it's time for the Ceremony.

I didn't notice Haymitch until he touched my shoulder and I turned around. "Easy. Just me," reassuring me. "Let me look at you." I do a little twirl. "Good enough." Not much of a compliment at all.

"But what?" I frown.

"But nothing. Just remember what I told you earlier." He pulls me into a quick hug and then says, "this is your night. Enjoy it, sweetheart."

With that, I start to shake. My night. It isn't my night. The only one who really deserves this is Peeta. I have to convince all of Panem that I am in love with him even if I am or not. I've never been in such a dangerous place before in my life. Yes, being hunted in the arena is bad; I could only die there. Here, I've got my family and people I love at home that could be severely punished if I don't act like the star-crossed lovers from District 12. And Peeta. I could hurt him worse and cause his family and the people he loves pain too. I couldn't do that to him either. I know he is already desperately in love with me. He doesn't need to act. He knows what to do. It should be easy for him. It's my problem. I just can't wait to go home and sort out my feelings. Who knows when that will be, and right now the most dangerous part of the Hunger Games is about to begin.

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_**I would love to hear what you all think. :) **_


	4. Chapter 4

Author's Note: I'm sorry it has been a little while since I updated. Christmas this year was surprisingly busy for me, and I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas. I want to thank my followers and reviewers. I also want to thank Puppylov40 and CuteBrunetteThatLovesHG192 for giving me ideas and supporting me. You guys are simply the best!

_**Btw: Chapter 5 is in the works and should be up early tomorrow evening depending on when I get home tomorrow. :)**_

_**Enjoy!**_

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The capital anthem roars through the speakers and the audience cheers. Then Caesar Flickerman makes his way center stage and greets them. The audience cheers louder by his approach and he gives a welcoming laugh. He quiets down the crowd as he begins to speak, "Ladies and Gentlemen, just four days ago we witnessed Panem's star-crossed lovers from Distract 12 win the 74th Hunger Games. In just a few minutes we will hear about what it was like for them inside of the arena, but first, let's introduce all who made it happen!" He laughs loudly and the audience cheers loudly again. I'm so not ready for this.

As I'm watching from the big flat screen on wall, I see Flavius, Venia, Octavia walk across the stage one by one receiving a few roars from the audience as Caesar Flickerman introduces them. They were bowing and shaking Caesar's hand like this was a once and a lifetime thing._ Sure it was, but couldn't they act a bit normal. _Caesar then motions for them to sit to the left of his seat, but not directly.

Cinna and Portia make their way on stage as Caesar calls them next. They wave and smile as the audience goes crazy. I imagine they are the number one designers now since mine and Peeta's appearance on the chariots. They then take their seats closer to Caesar's chair.

"Effie Trinket, District 12's escort, and Haymitch Abernathy, District 12's mentor!" As Caesar called her name, Effie made her way on stage. She looks so happy and surprisingly not acting as ridiculous as my prep team did. She looks like she is enjoying herself and I hope she is. As for Haymitch, he walks on the stage with a little stagger. He isn't drunk which is surprising. He's clean and freshened up nice. Haymitch is then smiling as Caesar shakes his hand. This just might be an actual happy moment for him. He was the only District 12 victor until now, and he's made history by keeping two tributes alive. Effie and Haymitch then take the seat right next Ceaser's chair on the left.

Then I notice there's a bright red love seat to the right which is this year's new victor chair since two lovers won the games. I now know that this where Peeta and I are meant to sit and we are next.

A woman dressed in many bright colors with a clipboard and an ear piece tells me I have fifteen seconds until I'm to be on stage. I swallow hard. I don't know why I'm getting so nervous now. I don't know what the cause is, certainly not Peeta even though this is the first time I will see him since the arena. Is it that I have to act like I'm in love with Peeta or is it the fact that I'm about to face all of Panem and convinece them of my love, and I might fail. I don't know. I mustn't.

"Now what everyone's been waiting for-," Caesar pauses and the crowd goes silent, but a few hollers and whistles are heard. "District 12 victors of the 74th Hunger Games, Peeta Mellark and Katniss Everdeen!"

I begin to walk across the stage and there is Peeta looking handsome as ever, healthy, and smiling his bright smile that makes smile no matter what conditions we were under walking towards me. Before I know it, we meet center stage and I fling myself into his arms. I caught him off guard which makes him readjust his balance which is odd. We pull each other into a tight hug and his right hand moves to my cheek. His fingers are in my hair and his thumb rubbing my cheek as his left arm is wrapped around me and that's when I feel slim metal cane presses against me by his strong grip. Something is very wrong. _Is he still recovering? What happened to him?_

The crowd goes wild and I look into his sparkling blue eyes questioning him, but then he kisses me. It's a wet and warm kiss, almost feeling like the one in the cave and I'm suddenly wanting more when I feel him about to part. I wrap my arms tighter around his neck and run my fingers through his golden hair. He presses me tighter against him and it almost hurts especially the cane pressing into my spine, but I don't care. It feels so good being in his arms.

I can barely hear the audience going crazy or hear Haymitch telling us that that's enough. Peeta parts only for a millisecond, no more than to catch a quick breath and then leads into another kiss and it's deeper and I can feel his tongue brush against my lips and I open up further allowing him in. Our tongues are doing a dance and this is to really new. I've never felt a kiss as powerful as this. My whole body is tingling and warm. I find myself almost moaning and even hear a low noise or two from him as well. I assume the audience can tell what's going on because they are louder than before and then I feel Haymitch tugging on my arm and I slowly back away.

I'm left breathless and dizzy and I feel as if the room is spinning. Peeta apologizes to Caessr and admits he couldn't help himself and takes my hand and we sit on the velvet love seat. Caesar and makes a little joke about it that has the whole crowd laughing. I'm left wondering if Peeta is feeling the way I feel right now. He probably is since he has been in love with me since we were little. I feel like I'm on fire.

I'm sitting as close as I can next to Peeta and I glance at Haymitch who sends me a look that it's not good enough of the part we talked about only ten minutes ago. I slip my shoes off and tuck them to the side of me and I rest my head on Peeta's shoulder. He puts his arm around me and I feel all warm inside like I once did during those nights I was curled against him. His shirt is the same color of my dress and the silk is soft against my cheek. The smell of his cologne is intoxicating and fills my stomach with a warmer feeling. _Why am I feeling this way?_ I never had these feelings before with anyone. The only guy I've ever hung around was Gale and I never felt this way around him.

Ceasar makes a few more jokes and then the worst part is beginning. I tense up and Peeta notices because he rests his cane against his right leg and places his right hand in my lap and without thinking I place my left in his. The lights dim and Capital symbol appears on the big screens all around and the scenes from the reaping all the way to arena starts to play.

I can't bare to watch. I want to get up from my seat and run, but I know I can't. Peeta is the only one keeping me here. I can't stand to see myself volunteer for my sister Prim and see Peeta reaped. I can't stand seeing Peeta and I riding in the chariot and seeing a few other tributes as well. I can't stand seeing Peeta mislead the Careers in a different direction risking his life to save mine. I can't stand seeing the fire balls that burnt my leg, or the tracker jackers that Rue showed me to kill the careers and possibly Peeta at that time. I can't stand seeing the boy from District 1 stab Rue and me shooting an arrow, killing him. I can't stand seeing myself singing her the meadow song my father taught me and cover her with flowers after she died in my arms. I can't stand seeing the part where Cato cuts Peeta's leg which caused blood poisoning. I can't stand to see myself rescue Peeta from the river and nursing him back to health the best I can. I can't stand seeing us kissing there in the cave no matter how much seeing it now sent another rush of warm feelings in my stomach remembering what it felt like. I can't stand seeing myself giving Peeta the shot Haymitch sent me so I could go get the backpack with the supplies we needed to stay alive longer. I can't stand seeing myself about to be killed my Clove. I can't stand seeing the mutts running after us and Cato about to kill Peeta. I can't stand seeing the mutts tear Cato apart and me shooting my arrow to send him out if his misery. I can't stand seeing myself pull out the berries and we are about to eat them and then hearing Peeta and I are the winners. I can't stand seeing myself pounding on the crystal glass window yelling Peeta's name as the doctors try to revive him. I can't stand seeing mine and Peeta's picture and the words "Winners of the 74th Hunger Games" on top as the heading.

The crowd is cheering and crying as the lights are brightened back to their original lighting. My body is shaking and my hand is almost numb by squeezing Peeta's hand too tight, but it isn't mine that's also numb. We both look at each other and send a brief apologetic smile. We both understand. It was just as difficult for him as it is for me. He kisses my forehead and the capital anthem blares loudly again. The crowd rises as well as all eight of us rise as well and I slip on my shoes quickly.

The atmosphere around me grows cold and I'm stunned in place. President Snow appears with a little girl dressed in white holding a cushion with this year's Victor Crown following him. The crowd falls silent and in front of Peeta and I is President Snow looking displeased.

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_**Cliffhangers...I know. I'm sorry, but I had to end it somewhere. Let me know what you guys think. Review or PM me. :) Thanks!**_


	5. Chapter 5

_**Author's note: Sorry for not updating when I said I would. I had some family issues going on, but don't worry. They are somewhat fixed. Chapter 6 should be up in the next two days for sure. **_

_**Enjoy!**_

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There is only one crown on the pillow. The crowd is confused as well as I. We don't know whose head that crown will be placed on. If I had to choose, it would be Peeta. He didn't do anything wrong, and he really deserves this. I've caused all the trouble we are in now. Not him.

President Snow then picks up the Victor Crown. He is glaring at me as he twists the crown which causes it to make a loud snap. He places the first half on Peeta and is smiling. They seem to have a little moment that leaves Peeta laughing. I couldn't understand what was said because the crowd begins to cheer as we are crowned winners. The president then places the other half on my head and he smiles darkly and his eyes are piercing and unforgiving.

That's when I know we should have eaten the berries no matter what riot became of it. I'm the one who is to be punished and blamed for the defiant act. I was just trying to save us from the misery we or I am about to be in.

President Snow then announces, "Ladies and gentlemen of Panem, I officially introduce you the winners of this years 74th Hunger Games, Peeta Mellark and Katniss Everdeen, District 12."

The crowd cheers and Peeta takes my hand and moves us forward as we bow and wave to the crowd. A few photographers in the front row move to get closer and they take a few photos of us. President Snow shakes our hand and then leaves the stage with the little girl. Peeta and I take our seats again and now the short interview is about to begin.

"First, I want to say congratulations to you both. It was an outstanding game that I haven't seen in years," says Caesar.

Peeta and I thank him at the same time and both try to say something. "No, you go ahead," says Peeta smiling at me.

"No, you go ahead," I say while blushing. _Why am I blushing?_

"Isn't this adorable folks?" Caesar says with a laugh. The crowd laughs and awes as well. Thank goodness he chipped in because I don't know what I was going to say. Anything I could say without thinking could cause harm to our families.

"Now Katniss," he says as I look at him, "everyone saw what you did for Rue before and after she died. How you cared for her and sing to her was so touching to all of us. Wasn't it folks?" Caesar asks the crowd.

The crowd responds in awes and a few cries are heard faintly.

"Who taught that song to you, my dear?"

Emotions hit me like a brick in my chest. Rue reminded me so much like Prim. So young and innocent and smart just like her. I try not to let anyone see the tears that are about to slip out. I swallow, trying to steady my breathing. I knew this question was coming. I just didn't know when. "My father taught it to me years ago before he died."

"It was very beautiful. Now this next question goes out to the both of you, but Peeta I will ask you to answer first. What was going through your mind after Cato had made a deep cut in your leg and hid by the lake side? Did you think that Katniss was going to find you?"

I slightly cringed after Caesar asked this question. Peeta must have felt me do so because he put his arm back around me like before. I decided to slip my shoes off again and sit back in the position I was before.

Peeta sighed and then answered. "Well Caesar, I can tell you that that cut was the worst feeling in the world. I knew it was deep just by the feel of it digging in my flesh at the time. It took me a long while to get down to the lake. I kept passing out and waking up in the middle of trying to camouflage myself. I figured that someone would find me at some point and I didn't think it would have been Katniss. I was thinking it would be one of the other tributes to finish me off instead of one tribute, who happens to be the love of my life, saving my instead."

The crowd awed as well as Caesar. Peeta took my hand in his and kissed it then brought it back to my lap with his hand still in mine.

"Katniss, what did you think?"

I pause for a moment, trying to think of the best way to answer. "I was hoping he wouldn't die on me. I didn't have a clue on what I was doing at the time and wasn't sure what I did was good enough."

"He most certainly is alive and well now," beams Caesar. The crowd cheers. "How is your new leg working out?"

"New leg?" I barely say. _What? Why does he have a new leg? _Then it hits me and I feel sick. I bend down to lift his left pants leg up just a little bit to see the metal and plastic device that replaces his flesh. There wasn't anything I could do to heal him. I've tried everything and he has a new leg. I've failed.

"No one told you?" Caesar asks.

"I never got the chance," says Peeta shrugging. "It's a lot different, but I'm getting used to it slowly. I'm sure in time I will be back to normal." He smiles.

"Indeed you will," Caesar smiles.

"It's all my fault because I used the tourniquet," I say.

"Yes, it's your fault I'm alive," he says taking my hand again.

"He's right," says Caesar. "He'd have bled to death for sure without it."

I guess that is true, and I can't help the fact that I'm about to cry. I'm on tv and try to push the thoughts of it out of my head for now. I can cry later. Not now. I wipe a few tears from my eyes and I cuddle up against Peeta again and place my hand on his chest gripping his shirt lightly.

About a few minutes pass and I feel myself relax. Peeta's warmth is comforting and relaxing. Our fingers are doing a little fiddling with each other as Caesar asks him a few more questions about teaming up with the careers to protect me and being in Cato's hold near the end at the face of his near death again as the final question of the night.

Caesar then bids the audience goodnight and reminds them to tune in tomorrow for a final interview before we head back home.

People are laughing and crying and hugging. I feel relieved that the questions are over and that I can finally relax and breath until tomorrow.

Haymitch and Effie and few other famous Capital people lead us to President Snow's mansion for the Victory Banquet.

The entire time I've had little time to eat while all the generous sponsors are wanting their picture taken with us. I can't help but hold Peeta's hand the entire time. The only reason being that I don't want to get lost and having him close to me makes me feel safe and wanting him near.

Hours pass and Effie is introducing more people to us and more pictures are taken. I'm super tired and the only person keeping me awake is the person who's still holding my hand. _Peeta. _How the Capitol stays up this late I will never know and I don't want to know. _This is ridiculous._ All of this just because the games are won by two victors in love. No wonder why Haymitch is getting drunk far worse than I've seen him.

Finally, it dies down as some people start to leave. Photographers are no longer surrounding us. Effie is dragging Haymitch along toward us and let's us know that we can leave and go to our quarters.

When we leave the elevator that took us to the twelfth floor at the Training Center, I thought I had my moment alone with Peeta. What I was going to say, I don't know but I did want to be alone with him. Haymitch sends Peeta off to his room while he escorts me to mine.

"Why can't I talk to him?" I ask sleepily.

"Because you're tired and you have an interview at 2 tomorrow. There will plenty of time to talk when we are all back home."

_If I couldn't talk to him now then I will simply wait until everyone goes to bed._ Or so I thought. I decided to shower and take my time, but that didn't happen. I didn't have much to scrub off and I felt the warm water, no matter how much I tried turning it down before it got too cold, I felt as if I was suffocating. I got out and threw on a shirt and some underwear from the dresser and climbed in bed. _Thirty minutes more then I would go to home. _Fifteen minutes into waiting, sleep found me.

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_**Please review or PM me about what you thought! Next update should be 2-3 days the most. :)**_


	6. Chapter 6

_**Author's Note: Hey everyone. Hope you all had a Happy New Year! Hope this hear brings a lot of happiness and be a year to remember!**_

_**I am trying to make my chapters longer and I will be going over my chapters this weekend to edit them. Even though I re-read them before I updated, I still noticed some careless mistakes that I will take care of. **_

_**Chapter 7 is also in the works and should be up before the weekend is through. **_

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing. Everything belongs to the famous, Suzanne Collins. **_

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Effie came to my room to remind me that we have another "big, big, big day!" My prep team comes rushing in and begins to fix me up while I'm trying to sneak a bite or two to eat of the breakfast brought to me. They rattle on and on about the banquet last night, how everyone loved us. How they were so happy that this happened in their life. How they now feel just like the other prep teams for the careers that always won the Games.

A few hours pass and they are done fixing my hair and applying little make up to my face. Cinna shoos them out as he helps me into a white dress with pink shoes. We hardly say a word to each other. I'm just wondering if he knows what is going on. Once Cinna is done, he leads me across the hall into the sitting room.

Caesar Flickerman is standing in the room talking with the camera crew. There isn't an audience which makes me feel better. The red velvety love seat has been moved in for us and vases full of pink and white roses surrounding it.

I make my way into the room and Caesar gives me a warm hug. "Congratulations, Katniss. How are you feeling?"

"Fine. Thanks," I say, barely managing a smile.

"Nervous about the interview?" he asks kindly. I nod. "Well don't be. We're going to have a marvelous time. Nothing you will say will be wrong," he says, patting my cheek.

_If only that was true._ Then Peeta enters the room looking handsome as ever, dressed in red and white pulling me off to the side. "I hardly get to see you. Haymitch seems bent on keeping us apart."

"Yes, he's gotten very responsible lately," I say. There's too many people around to actually tell Peeta what's going on. He needs to know. His life could be at risk, too.

He slips his arms around me before I realize it and says, "Well, there's just this and we go home. Then he can't watch us all the time." He's about to kiss me and I'm getting those feelings again. Our face are just inches apart and j can feel mine heating up and my stomach is doing flips. His hand moves to my cheek and his eyes are watching mine, searching. "Katniss...," he breaths and then he looks up. They are ready for our final interview. Peeta lets me go and takes my hand, leading us to the seat.

I can't think about what all of that was just about. I'm trying to steady my breathing. Caesar is smiling at us, probably because he was watching that little moment Peeta and I were just having. At least he really believes we're in love with no question even though we aren't. We sit somewhat formally, but Caesar says, "Oh, go ahead and curl up next to him if you want. It looked very sweet." So I tuck my feet up and Peeta pulls me close and now the feelings I just had bubbled up again and are a lot stronger.

A man counts backward from five and then we are broadcasted live all over Panem. Caesar Flickerman is teasing and joking and getting choked up when the occasion presents itself. He and Peeta are talking nonstop and I smile and chip in little as I can. It isn't until Caesar asks questions which call for a bigger response.

"Well, Peeta, we know, from our days in the cave, that it was love at first sight for you from what, age five?" recalls Caesar.

"From the moment I laid eyes on her," says Peeta.

"But, Katniss, what a ride for you. I think the real excitement, especially for the audience, was watching you fall for him. When did you realize you were in love with him?" Caesar asks.

"Oh, that's a hard one..." I give a faint, breathy laugh and look at my hands. I don't know. When would be a good moment for them to believe I fell for Peeta? I'm still trying to figure out if I am in love with him.

"Well I know, when it hit me. The night when you shouted out his name from that tree," says Caesar.

_Thank you, Caesar!_ I think, and then go with his idea. "Yes, I guess that was it. I mean, before Claudius Templesmith announced that two tributes from the same district could win, I pushed my feelings out of my head and was afraid that I actually cared about him. Once I was in the tree and heard it, everything changed." I say.

"Why do you think that was?" urges Caesar.

"Maybe because for the first time...there was a chance I could keep him," I say.

Behind a cameraman, I see Haymitch letting out a sigh of relief and I know I've said the right thing. Caesar takes a moment and pulls out his handkerchief because he is so moved. I feel Peeta press his forehead into my temple and asks, "So now that you've for me, what are you going to do with me?"

I turn into him so that now both of our foreheads are touching. "Put you somewhere you can't get hurt." Then he kisses me. This kiss again sends a warm, butterfly feeling in my stomach. My body is heated and I don't want to part from our kiss, but the sighs in the room and someone, I assume Haymitch, makes a slight cough causes us to.

Caesar then talks about the other ways we got hurt in the arena that weren't mentioned last night from burns, to stings, to wounds. This then leads to the final question for the interview.

"Now it's a shame we couldn't talk about this last night, but Katniss, the moment when you pulled out those berries, what was going on in your mind?"

I pause and think for a long moment. This could the the true undoing if I don't answer this right. This is the moment where I challenged the Capitol or went so crazy at the idea of losing Peeta that I can't be held responsible for my actions. I simply say, "I just couldn't bare the thought...of being without him."

"Peeta, anything to add?" asks Caesar.

"I think that goes for both of us," he says.

I hear a few sighs from the crew again and Caesar then signs off. Everyone is crying and laughing, but I'm not relieved until I reach Haymitch. "Okay?" I whisper.

"Perfect," he answers.

We leave five minutes later after Caesar Flickerman and his camera crew clear the room and leave. I head back to my room to gather a few of my belongings and we head out to the car awaiting us. We barely had time to say goodbye to everyone even though we will see them in a few months for the Victory Tour in late November.

It is the normal four of us, Haymitch, Effie, Peeta, and I, on the train. There's a huge feast set out for us and we eat in silence. By the time we finish up, the television is showing our interview live over Panem.

"You two look so adorable together," Effie exclaims. "You'll be the talk for weeks. Just wait until the Victory Tour just around the corner. Everyone will be dying for the dish of you too!"

With that, I excuse myself to go to my room. I take a quick shower and clear myself of all my makeup. I wash all the perfume and lotion on me and all the hair products that were once in my hair. Once I get out, I put on a dark blue t-shirt and some jeans. I braid my hair to the side and put on some shoes. I leave my bedroom and head toward the back of the train where to roof comes out like a big huge window meeting the seats surrounding it. I sit sideways pulling my knees to my chest and wrap my arms around my legs. My head is resting on my knees as I stare out the window watching the Capitol signs fade away.

I'm finally able to rest easy and think about home. About my mother and Prim and Gale. How life will be different for is now that I've won the Games. How Prim is alive and will be able to be well now that she doesn't have to starve. Hoping my mother will start to be happy again and be more lively...the train suddenly comes to a stop. I'm slightly alarmed and feel like President Snow is now watching me. I quickly make it back into the main room and there's Peeta headed my direction.

"Do you want to take a little walk? It's going to take almost an hour to fuel up the train. Haymitch said he would get us if we weren't back in time to leave again," says Peeta.

"Sure," I say.

We head out the side door and walk down the track. Without thinking I take Peeta's hand in mine. I'm unsure of what to say now that we're alone. I don't even recall what I wanted to talk to him about the night before. He stops and gathers a bunch of wildflowers and presents them to me. I can't help but smile even if the pink-and-white flowers are the tops of wild onions. This makes me think of the long hours I've spent with Gale in the woods. I will be seeing him in a matter of hours. The idea makes me sick and I don't know why. It's not like I've done anything wrong. All I have done was to keep me safe, and Peeta in the end. It's not like I'm in love with him or anything. I feel like I've been lying to someone who trusts me. Well two people, in fact. I've gotten away with it so far thanks to the Games, but now there are no more Games to hide behind back home.

"What's wrong?" Peeta asks.

"Nothing," I answer trying to hide my thoughts. We walk further down the tracks in silence.

Haymitch came out of nowhere laying a hand on both mine and Peeta's shoulder. We both jump and turn around shocked. "Great job, you two. Just keep it up in the district until the cameras are gone. We should be okay." I watch him head back to the train and I start to follow instead of looking at Peeta.

"What's he mean?" Peeta asks.

I stop in my tracks. "It's the Capitol. They didn't like our act with the berries," I blurt out.

"Wait? What? What are you talking about?"

"It seemed too rebellious. Haymitch has been coaching me through the last few days, so I wouldn't make it any worse," I say.

"Coaching you...but not me?"

I sigh. He's getting upset. I wish I kept my mouth shut. Silence was so much better. "He knew you were smart enough to get it right."

"I didn't know there was anything to get right," says Peeta. "So, what you're saying is, these last few days and then I guess...back in the arena...that was just some strategy you two worked out."

"No. I mean, I couldn't even talk to him in the arena, could I?" I stammer.

"But you knew what he wanted you to do, didn't you?" says Peeta. I bite my lip. "Katniss?" He drops my hand and steps back from me. I feel alone at the lose of contact.

"It was all for the Games...how you acted," says Peeta. He looks hurt. I don't know what to do. I'm only making it worse.

"Not all of it," I say, tightly holding onto my flowers.

"Then how much?" he says pausing for a moment. Thinking I had my chance to speak he continues, "No, forget that. I guess the real question is what's going to be left when we get home?"

"I don't know. The closer we get to twelve the more confused I get. I don't know what I feel. Peeta I..."

"Come one, you two!" I hear Haymitch hollering out to us.

"Well, let me know when you work it out," he says with pain in his voice. He begins to head back and I stand there, taking in what just happened. I give him a few more minutes in space and then I begin to walk.

Once we're back on the train, Peeta is nowhere to be found but in his room. I head to mine and remain there until we pull into twelve. Every few minutes I want to go to Peeta and tell him that it'd be pointless to want to be with me because I don't want to get married and have children. I've never planed for it after my father died. If I did have feelings for Peeta, I wouldn't ever be able to afford the kind of love that leads to a family, to children. He'd just end up hating me sooner than later in our relationship if we ever did. Sure, every kiss and hug and closeness that we had during the interviews sent feelings through my body that I don't even understand. My father didn't seem to second guess himself when he was alive with my mother. She was happy with not a doubt insight.

There's a knock on my door. It's Haymitch. "We're here. Just a little while longer and then everything will be alright," he says.

I fix my hair and meet Peeta. He gives me a slight smile. I already want to tell him how much I miss him, but that wouldn't be fair on my part. He extends out his hand. "One more time for the audience?" he says. His voice is filled with sadness. Already the boy with the bread is slipping away from me and I feel lonely and cold.

I take his hand, holding on tightly, as if I'm holding on for my life, preparing for the camera, and dreading the moment when I finally have to let go.

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_**Things are about to get a lot different from the book as I go into what happens during those months before the Victory Tour is taken place.**_

_**Please review or PM me and let me know what you guys think. **_


	7. Chapter 7

**_Author's Note: Hi everyone. So I decided that I needed to fix the careless mistakes I found while I re-read my works. So those of you that have the story alerts, I am sorry if you think that I posted so many chapters. I only edited them. Buuuuut I did make chapter 1 a little bit longer in a way. It's up to you if you want to re-read it. It's nothing major. _**

**_With thy that said, here is chapter 7! _**

**_Enjoy and please review!_**

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It's been five months since Peeta and I won the Hunger Games. It's been five months since I last talked to him about anything. It's been five months since we've kissed, hugged, or did anything to convince the Capitol of "our" love.

Right now I'm in the meadow. The cool October breeze is comforting. The sun is disappearing fast as it turns into night and the breeze is picking up. I'm alone. I killed a lot of squirrels, more than I need and it's already too late for me to go trade. I can't help but sit here in deep thought.

I keep thinking about the kiss Peeta and I shared during the interview. The one where we kissed for a long couple of minutes. How my body reacted, leaving me wanting more. The heated feeling on my skin and how tingly my body felt. How soft his hair was and how good he smelt. How his fingers were in my hair, his palm touching my cheek. How tight he was holding me against him. Feeling his muscles press against me. Hearing faint moans escape from both of us. It felt we were the only two people in the world at the moment until Haymitch pulled us away. He's always getting in the way in those moment.

When I came back from the Capitol, Gale told me about how he and Madge Undersee are together. Thinking about them, they do make a cute couple. For years I've known Madge had a crush on him. A few times I mentioned it Gale, but he would laugh it off. Now he's in love with her. Gale and I are truly just friends. I'm not disappointed. I was relieved when I found out. He wasn't mad at how I acted with Peeta. He was just disappointed when I told him it was all an act. Gale understood though. He knows how I feel about love and all that stuff.

Our Sundays mostly consist of hunting and checking his snares, our normal routine. It's when we get to the Hob and in town that Madge gets dragged into our day. The way they are together, you can tell their in love. He holds her hand and kisses her and teases and jokes. She blushes and giggles at everything he does and hangs onto every word. She fears for his safety when he works in the mine, and I admit, that I do too. Madge will sometimes ask me and how Peeta and I are. I lie and say that we are good and then Gale jumps in and changes the conversation. He know how Peeta and I are and he promised not to tell anyone, especially Madge.

It isn't until recently that I've wondered what a relationship would be like with Peeta. He's kind and he's loving. He's sweet and charming. His hair is perfect and his eyes, the perfect shade of blue. He's taller than me and muscular. I know if I had confessed my love to him right away after that conversation off the train, he probably wouldn't believe me. Now if I came to his doorstep, he probably would laugh at me and hate me even more. I know he'd be kind and loving and it would be difficult for me to let go of my fears of losing him. But I don't have him now, and if I do go right up to his door and he turns me down, would my heart break? I wouldn't lose him as a lover, but maybe as a friend. Maybe we aren't friends anymore. Our exchanges for meat and bread have been so cold. Only five words are said on both ends and then we go on with our lives.

The sun is gone and the temperature dropped. I've grown a bit cold and decide to head home to Victor Village. I head inside my new home the Capitol provider. My mom and Prim are in the kitchen.

"Hey honey," my mother calls out.

"Hi," I say. "I've got a lot of meat. Sorry I was gone so long. Was out thinking again." Prim runs into me and hugs me tightly. She shortly releases me and I walk over to my mom, handing her the bag.

"Oh wow, Katniss. Maybe you should go invite Haymitch and Peeta over. It's been a long while since they came over," my mother says She stops for a minute and then says, "And now that your Tour is coming up..."

"Sure, mom," I interrupt her sentence.

I head back out the front door and a few steps ahead I reach Haymitch's home. I knock on the door a few times and there's no answer. I try the knob and it's unlocked. I open the door slowly and creep in. "Haymitch?" I call out.

"What do you want?" he yells out. I hear a few glasses break. He's drunk as usual. How a person can live like this I will never know.

"Would you like to have dinner with my family tonight?" I ask. I take a few more steps in and I see him sitting on couch.

"Is lover boy gonna be there?"

"I don't know. I haven't asked him yet." Why does he want to know that?

"Then no."

"Alright then. Have a nice night." I say, walking away. I open up the door, and then he says, "Yeah, you too, sweetheart." I close the door behind me and walk over to Peeta's.

I knock on his door and he opens it.  
"Hey Katniss. What's up?" he asks. There he is standing in front of his doorway. He looks handsome even though his hair is messed up and his shirt has a few flour stains on it.

"Umm...would you like to have dinner with my family tonight?" I ask, smiling. He always has that affect on me.

"Sure. Just let me go change real quick."

"You look fine the way you are," I blurt out. Oh my god. What is wrong with me. Why did I just say that? Peeta is laughing at me. Now I think he thinks I'm an idiot.

"Thanks, Katniss, but I don't think your mother wants me tracking flour through your house." He smiles. "I'll be right back. You can come in if you want. You don't have to wait out in the cold."

I take up the offer and come inside. Peeta heads upstairs. His house is the same set up as mine. I wonder if the Capitol did this on purpose. His house is warm and smells like cinnamon. I make my way into the kitchen to find if something is different. I'm working. Cabniets are everywhere and there's a kinda big table. In the counter is a plate of cookies that look freshly made and are covered in icing.

"You can bring some over if you want, for Prim," Peeta says as he enters the kitchen. He walks over closer to me. He combed his hair and he's wearing wearing a jacket. I can barley are the dark green shirt he is wearing. I then wonder if it's cold upstairs since his jacket is zipped up. I blush at the thought thinking of what his upstairs looks like. Even his bedroom. I feel a warm pool deep in my belly again. This cannot be happening. "Here," he says, grabbing a plate and hands it to me. I pick a few cookies and Peeta grabs a load of bread. "You ready to go?"

"Yes," I say. We exit the kitchen and go out the front door. It's gotten colder out since the last fifteen minutes it feels. We quickly walk over back to by house. We get inside and I accidentally slam the door shut, causing my mother to slip a curse word out.

"Sorry," I holler.

"It's okay," my mother hollers back. Prim comes running to greet me again and then stops and looks at Peeta. She is smiling up at him. Is she amazed just as I am of his good looks?

"I brought over some cookies. We can have them after we eat," he tells Prim. Her smile only brightens and thanks him. She takes the plate from my hands and shows it to my mom. Peeta and I make our way into the kitchen after we take off our coats.

We all gather at the table after the meet is cooked. I tell my mom that Haymitch didn't want to come over and I insist that I will bring him a plate when we are done. Prim asks Peeta a lot of questions about the bakery. He isn't annoyed. He's actually happy. He just smiles and answers her questions.

"Will you teach me how to bake?" asks Prim.

"Sure," he says to her. "I can always use an extra pair of hands.

"Mama can I go over there tomorrow?" Prim asks immediately.

"That depends if you can get your sister to go with you," she says.

"Katniss! Can we? Please?" begs Prim.

"We will see, Little Duck."

"I'll make her come with me," Prim tells Peeta. I blush and Peeta smiles at me.

Peeta hangs over for an hour more. The whole time I'm staring at him unless I say something to someone else. Peeta sometimes catches me staring at him and I glance away and then stare at him again when he isn't looking. Maybe I will tell him tonight, finally let it all go and give in.

"Well, I should get going," Peeta says.

"See you tomorrow, Peeta!" beams Prim.

My mother fixes a warm plate so I can bring it over to Haymitch. Peeta and I are at the door way putting our coats back on.

"Thanks again, Mrs. Everdeen," says Peeta.

"You're welcome," my mother says. "Anytime you want, feel free to come over." She hands me the plate of food and we head out the door. We're in the middle of the pathway to Haymitch's house.

"Why don't you give it to him? He didn't seem too happy with me coming over earlier," I say.

"Okay," he says, taking the plate. Peeta doesn't knock. He simply opens the door and shuts it again. A few minutes later Haymitch and Peeta are in the door way and Haymitch waves at me while Peeta walks his way back to me. I wave back and then Haymitch closes the door.

"What was that about?" I ask.

"Nothing not all," says Peeta.

We walk to Peeta's doorway and we stop. "So will I be expecting you two tomorrow?" he asks breaking the silence.

"I think so," I say.

"Okay. Well see you then." Peeta turns and he unlocks his door.

"See you later." I turn around and I'm about to walk away when the unexpected happens.

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**_Cliffhanger! Sorry! Chapter 8 is now being written! What's going to happen? Is she going to tell him? Will he accept it? Will he confess to her first? Or is this just going to be a simple restart of a friendship? _**

**_Would love to hear your thoughts and ideas! PM me or review! Chapter 8 should be up in a day or two! _**

**_Thanks!_**


	8. Chapter 8

_**Author's note: The update is early, I know! I'm excited too!**_

_**This chapter is for sure rated M I guess you could say.**_

_**It's my first attempt to writing something like this. If you don't like it, PM me. Please don't leave me a nasty review. It will be deleted as soon as I figure out how. If there is something I should work better on, let me know. I cannot stress this enough. I aim to please as well as I can without stepping out of my comfort zone! Your replies determine if I skip the smut or not.**_

_**Enjoy and please review! They are love!**_

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Peeta grabs my arm and pulls me into his warm embrace. His lips crash onto mine. I'm stunned in place. I can't move my arms. I try to wiggle them, and then his hold loosens. I wrap my arms around his neck and his are around my waist. I allow my lips to move with his. This kiss feels like the one we shared before, but it's a whole lot more. My body feels like it's burning. My insides are turning and feel like their melting inside. The cold wind blowing sends chills through me and makes me break the kiss. Peeta holds me tighter against him and looks into my eyes. I don't know what he's searching for, but then he kisses me again without saying a word. I feel his tongue brush against my lips and I allow it in. Our tongues are doing a dance. It all feels so good. I let out a moan that I don't realize. I wrap my arms tighter around him pressing him against me even more until there isn't a open space between our bodies. I feel the warmth get hotter and I feel something hard against me. I try to ignore this for now and not think of it. I just want to enjoy his lips on mine.

His lips move to my jaw and trace to my neck and near my ear. I take a moment to catch my breath as quickly as I can before he decides to kiss me again. I let out a moan and my breathing is speeding up as he is sucking on my earlobe. "Come inside with me," he breathes in my ear.

"Okay," I say and he kisses me again. We let each other go and he opens the door. I'm the last to enter in and I shut the door and lock it. When I face Peeta again, his hands reach up to my face and he kisses me again. He pushes me against the door. His body is pressing into me and it's driving me crazy. My fingers are pulling at his golden hair and I'm deepening the kiss. Our tongues again find their way to each other and seems to be in a frenzy.

My instinct tells me that a lot more could happen if we keep doing this. Things that people in love would do. I'm in love with this man in front of me, that I realized from the beginning and I couldn't express it because I was scared. Because I was afraid. I'm not afraid anymore and even though I'm sure he knows right now, I need to tell him I'm just as in love with him as he is in love with me.

"Peeta...," I say breathlessly against his lips. He gives me another long kiss, and then is trailing kisses all over my neck and jaw on my left side.

"What?" he asks.

"I...uh...," I say. God I can't find the words. I can hardly think straight with him kissing me like this. "I think...I," I try again, only failing.

Peeta stops and looks at me again. "What are you trying to say?" He laughs and then he gives me a kiss and I frown at how quick the kiss was.

_Courage, Katniss. Courage. Find your courage. _"I love you," I mumble out.

"What?" he asks. _He didn't hear me? Why does this have to be so complicated?_

"I said...I said that I...I love you." Peeta stares at me and doesn't say anything for what seems life forever when it's only a couple of minutes.

"Dammit, Katniss," he says as the side of his fist hits the door next to my cheek. "Why? Why are you telling me now?" His face is a few inches from mine. I thought he was going to kiss me, but he backs away from me.

"I'm sorry," I say. I thought he would be happy. I wasn't expecting this from him. I don't know what I was expecting, honestly. I know this isn't good though.

"No. I'm sorry," Peeta says. He takes my hand and leads me to the three seated couch in the living room.

"You told me on the last day we spent together, you wanted to know how much was true and wasn't true...that you wanted me to let you know when I figured out my feelings. Well, I have."

"Okay. I'm listening."

I'm still holding onto his hand and stare deep into his eyes. They are mixed with so much emotion.

"Before, when we were in the Training Center, we were just strangers and I didn't know what to think of you. I was angry when you told Caesar Flickerman you were in love with me...how I acted in the arena...it was all for show mostly. When we were in the cave and we kissed. I felt something spark inside me, but I ignored it because I was scared for our lives. When I pulled out the berries, it was true. I didn't want to live without you. I already thought I had you and then the Gamemakers had to ruin it. When you kissed me for the first time since the four days I felt the feeling again like I did in the cave. It felt a lot stronger. I meant that kiss. It wasn't for show. I was so worried about you. I didn't know whether you were truly alive or not until that night." I feel tears streaming down my face and I wipe them off. I'm trying to breath, but my nose is clogged. I feel so unattractive right now because I'm wiping my nose on my arm and trying to rub the snot off my arm on my pants leg.

"Katniss," Peeta begins but I put my finger on his lips.

"No. Listen please. I need to get this out," I say while removing my finger from his lips. He only nods.

"It's been five months of nothing without you in my life. I've been so blind by trying to keep my heart safe from losing the ones I love. I couldn't fall for anyone, but I was already falling for you and I didn't even know it. You saved me countless times and you've given me hope when no one else did. I don't want to wonder anymore what my life would be like without you in it. Or how it would be with you in it. I want to know. I want to be with you, Peeta. Not anyone else. You know I'm a terrible liar. So tell me if you believe I'm lying."

Peeta is staring at me and I feel like a fool. He hasn't said anything yet. I'm now staring at my hands, waiting helplessly for an answer. This is probably this worst moment in my life besides being in the Hunger Games.

I let go of his hand. I'm about to get up from the couch, but he takes my hand again. "Katniss," he says. I look at him. He places his hand on my cheek and he's leaning closer to me. "I believe you. I really do. I love you too." Peeta then closes the space between us and he kisses me. It's a slow sweet, passionate kiss. Both his hands are on both of my cheeks. I move closer to him which causes him to lean back into the couch. One of his hands move to the side of my waist and I decide to move on top of him.

Both my legs are on the sides of his and I'm sitting in his lap. His hands are now on my waist and mine are on the back of the couch next to his head. Our kisses are more intense. Peeta's hands are moving along my sides and slips underneath my shirt. They travel up and cup my breasts. I let out a low moan. "God, Katniss," he says. His lips go to my neck and he's sucking that spot again which causes me to moan louder.

His hands reach behind me and he unhooks my bra. His hands travel down and go back up along my sides. Every where he touches leaves a heated path. My body is on fire and my body is tingling. I don't want this stop. Everything he's doing feels so right. Peeta's hands touch my bare breasts and before I can let out a moan he's lips capture mine again. His fingers are playing with my nipples which sends an electric feeling to my core.

I arch my back away from him as the warm sensation grows stronger. His teeth graze my jaw to my neck. It sends a little pain, but it excites me. It causes me to fall forward against his chest. His arms are wrapped around me again and then he moves us. He lays me on the couch and gets ontop of me. It's more comfortable and I'm happy about that. He's kissing me again and I lift up his shirt. Once it reaches up to his shoulders he only breaks the kiss for a second and throws his shirt to the ground. His lips move roughly against mine. I can feel the hardness of him pressing against me again. I know what it is and I'm glad I'm the cause of it. I let one of my hands play in his hair and I move the other to the bulge in his pants.

Peeta moans loudly and then grabs my wrist and brings it above my head. "I want this to be about you first before me," he says darkly. I feel a chill run down my spine and I shiver. I know exactly what he means and I want it too. I also just want him to take me now.

My shirt is only raised to my stomach and I try to take it off, but Peeta tells me to leave it. His hands undo the button and zipper of my pants and his hand slips into my pants. I moan out and arch my back, pressing myself into him as I feel his fingers start to rub my folds.

I feel the heat rise in my body. My arms are wrapped around him, holding on tight. I'm gasping for air as he kisses me and continues to work on my spot. I feel something starting to build inside me. I don't want him to stop. It feels so good.

"Peeta..." I call out his name. He's kissing my neck and his left hand is on my breast, squeezing and tugging my nipple.

"Does that feel good, Katniss?" he asks playfully.

"Oh god, yes," I moan out. I'm getting close and his fingers are moving faster.

I scream out his name as my orgasm hits me. I pull Peeta's head towards me and I kiss him carelessly. He lays his head on my chest and I lay there with my eyes closed.

I'm unsure of what to say."That was amazing," I say, feeling stupid. I don't know what you say after these things.

"I've got a lot more planned when we have more time together," says Peeta. I blush at the thought of having sex with Peeta. "You should head home. Your mom must be worried about you."

"I guess I should go. I wish I could stay with you."

"Me too."

We get up from the couch and head to the door way. I'm too lazy to hook my bra. I put on my father's hunting jacket and zip it halfway up so my mother wouldn't notice.

"I'm sorry again, for waiting so long," I say.

"Don't be," Peeta says while pulling me into a hug. "What matters now is that we are finally together and happy. No more dreading. I'd walk you to your door, but that would be even more suspicious since your mom is still up and you've been gone for a while."

"I love you, Peeta," I say looking deep into his eyes.

He smiles. "I love you too, Katniss Everdeen."

We kiss for a couple more minutes in his door way and then I leave. No body is up at home thank goodness. I close the door gently and head upstairs. I get ready for bed and then get in bed. I'm truly happy. My father once told me that he wanted me to be happy like mama was with him and I finally made his wish come true. Peeta Mellark is the love of my life, and we are finally in each other's life with nothing holding back.

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**_What happens at the bakery? Will their love continue to blossom?_**


	9. Chapter 9

**_Author's note: I feel like I didn't do a good job in this chapter. I'm kinda disappointed. If you aren't happy with it. I'm sorry. Please don't hate me. Let me know what you think of it. _**

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It's early morning. I feel the happiest I've ever been. I get dressed quickly and braid my hair. I look in the mirror and notice a slight dark bruise on my neck. Then I remember that Peeta kept kissing, sucking, and biting me there. I'm going to kill him later especially if anyone notices. I decide to wear my hair down because of it.

I glance at myself once more in the mirror and wake up Prim.

"Come on, sleepy head. You have five minutes to get dressed before I change my mind to go to Peeta's." I tickle Prim which causes her to squeal.

"Really? We're gonna go to the bakery?" she asks happily.

"Yeah, come on," giving her a smile. I leave her room and head downstairs. My mother is sitting at the kitchen table drinking some coffee.

"Morning mom," I say to her as I walk in.

"Good morning darling. You didn't stay out too late, did you?" she asks.

I blush, remembering all that happened last night. "No. Not at all." My mother smiles. _I wonder if she suspects anything._

I hear Prim making her way down the stairs. I head over to the front door and put on my coat. Instantly I flip my hair over the collar of the coat.

"Katniss, what is that on your neck?" asks Prim.

_Oh my god this can't be happening._ "Nothing. It's just a bruise," I say quickly. Now I'm really going to kill him.

"Katniss," my mother calls out.

"Bye mom. Come on, Prim. Let's go." I open the front door and leave. Prim soon catches up to me.

"How'd you get the bruise?" asks Prim. She won't leave this alone, will she?

Fooling around with Peeta is not the answer I'm wanting to give her. "It was an accident... last night when I came home," I say slowly, hoping she believes me. "I fell."

"I didn't hear anything."

"That's because you were asleep, Little Duck."

"I really couldn't sleep last night, and the only noises I heard were your sneaky footsteps."

_Crap_. "I...uh..." I'm at a lose of words. Think. "Prim," I sigh. "You will understand when you're older."

"Okay," she pouts. "Does it involve Peeta?"

"Prim!" I yell out. God why won't she hush up.

"Okay, I will stop. I'm sorry."

"It's okay, Little Duck." Now I feel bad that I made her feel bad about asking me questions. Shouldn't I be able to tell her about Peeta and I?

Make her smile. "Are you excited about today?" I look down at Prim as we near the bakery. There's a smile on her face and I know succeeded.

"Yes! Thank you for coming with me!"

"Anything for you, Little Duck." I place my arm around her shoulders and we walk like this the rest of the way.

"Hey Peeta!" beams Prim as we enter the bakery.

"Hey Prim. Hey Katniss," Peeta says. He's wearing khaki pants and a light blue shirt that has a little v by the neck. The shirt brings out his eyes, those eyes that I could look into forever. They shine bright into the sun as it shines through the door and the windows. He's so handsome. My eyes travel to his lips as he's talking to Prim. I'm suddenly wishing she isn't here so I can kiss him. I don't see why I can't while she's here. It's not like she hasn't seen people kiss before. I just don't want to start another conversation like she mentioned my neck. I feel the blush heat my cheeks and neck. I'm suddenly feeling hot everywhere and remove my jacket.

Prim is tugging on my arm. "Hmm?" I say dreamily wishing his lips were on mine right now and not talking.

"Peeta just asked you a question." Prim is smiling at me ridiculously. She must have some clue now.

"What? I'm sorry." My face reddens more. _Pull it together._

"What would you like how to make?" Peeta asks again, throwing his dashing smile toward me. Love, I think to myself. Surely I can't tell him that, but I want to. Is that too forward? I blush again. It will never end.

"Well I'm here just for Prim. So whatever she wants to make, you can teach me too."

"Just for Prim?" he laughs and looks hurt. Now he's messing with me and I blush again.

"Well for your sake too." I smile.

"Well Katniss, grab some aprons over there on the rack. Prim you can get yourself used to the cabinets back here behind the counter. We're going to make muffins."

"Yay," Prim cheers. Her smile is bright and she's happy. They are getting along great. They are joking and laughing and making a huge mess. They both try placing muffin mix on my face or anywhere they can, but I send them my death glare. I just lean against the counter and watch the two of them work.

It takes fifteen minutes for the muffins to cook. While we wait, we eat a few of the cookies out on display. I look at all the cakes in the window and am amazed at the beauty. I never really noticed how marvelous they looked before. Peeta is truly talented.

Peeta comes up behind me and sneaks his arms wrapped around my waist. "Maybe I will make you one for your birthday." I know he's talking about the cakes.

"When we are training next year'a tributes? You won't have time for that..." I frown. Seven months from now will be the Third Quarter Quell. Peeta and I will be the new mentors.

"We will find time, but we don't have to worry about that right now," he breathes in my ear and I feel goosebumps form on my skin. The timer rings and I jump. It surprises me how easily I can get lost around Peeta.

"There done!" exclaims Prim.

Peeta walks over and hands her an oven mitt. He opens the oven for her and Prim carefully takes the muffins out. We let them cool and then we eat them.

Prim begs Peeta to make a few more dozens of muffins and begs to come back and help him with work tomorrow. Peeta agrees and says he will be over early tonight. I can't help, but wonder if tonight might be another repeat.

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**_Remember...Reviews are love and fills me with happiness, and helps me update faster! :)_**


	10. Chapter 10

**_Author'a note: Sorry it's been a few days since I updated. Had a little difficulty with this._**

**_Thank you _****CuteBrunetteThatLovesHG192****_ for bringing an idea into my head and allowing me to bring it to life. I hope I did it justice for you. As to my readers, thank you so much for your kind reviews and continuing to read this story. I love you all so much._**

**_A slight warning...for mild language and a little bit of fluff._**

**_Let me know what you all think!_**

**_Enjoy!_**

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Peeta came over later that evening to have dinner again with my family. I had planned to bring over another plate of food for Haymitch, but my mother protested and wouldn't let me leave the house because of "how cold it was" outside. I was looking forward to going with Peeta.

Before Peeta went out the door, he must have noticed how upset I was and whispered darkly in my ear, "There's always tomorrow." Then he kissed me slowly and then walked out.

The next morning I headed out early and went hunting. It was freezing cold and a few snow flurries fell around. I killed a few turkeys and some squirrels. I dropped off some meat at home. I checked on Haymitch before I headed into town. It didn't do any of us good. He was passed out drunk and he only had two bottles left, so I decided I should buy him some more. After all he did for us, he deserved that and a lot more. I also made a mental note that I should come over and clean the place up. I told myself I would at least a couple times a month and failed.

I made my way into town. I didn't bother trading today. I gave what I had to Graesy Sae and a few other town people. I then bought a few supplies here and there for Prim and my mother. I bought a good amount of liquor for Haymitch and an extra bottle for my mom to use to help calm down the patients.

I make my way over to the bakery. I head inside and Mr. Mellark greets me. "Hello, Katniss."

"Good afternoon, Mr. Mellark. Is Peeta here?"

He smiles. "Sure. Let me go get him for you."

A minute later, Peeta shows up with his father. "Hey Katniss."

"Hey Peeta."

"Dad, can Katniss come back here and help? I'll make sure she won't get in the way of things." Peeta sends me a quick wink and I blush.

"I don't see why not. Being a Victor, you must have a lot of free time."

"Thanks dad."

"Have fun, you two," Mr. Mellark says as he begins cleaning the front of the bakery.

Peeta takes my hand and leads me to the back that's hidden behind a door. There's a few more ovens and counters. Different pans are all around. The air is filled with cinnamon and vanilla as a few pastries and breads are in the oven. I notice on the counter are long pans and a few bowls. Flour is everywhere, even on the floor.

"Do you want to make some cookies? There for a birthday party down the road. You can bring the extras home if you want," Peeta says. So that's what he does on his free time. Make the younger children's day brighter.

"Sure," I say. Peeta hands me an apron and leads me to the counter. He grabs some dough out of the bowl and sets it in front of me. He brings over a bowl full of flour and covers his hands and the area we will work at with it. I'm looking at him questionably. I don't understand a thing at all. Peeta picks up on lack of knowledge. "It keeps the dough from sticking to the counter."

"Oh." Peeta smiles at me.

Peeta moves close behind me and his hands find mine. He rubs some flour over my hands and rests mine next to the dough. He then presses his lower body weight into me and I moan at the closeness of us and the feel of his hardness pressing firmly into my backside.

Peeta reaches around and grabs the rolling pin. "Roll the dough with the pin,"he says as his hands are ontop of mine, guiding the pin. Once I get the hang of spreading it around Peeta hands start wondering up my arms, to my shoulders, down my back, and to the sides of my waist. Wet kisses are feathered down my neck. I rest my head on his shoulder granting him more access. I let out a moan when Peeta playfully bites my neck. I let go of the rolling pin and slightly turn my body and place my right hand on his left cheek. I move his head so that he is looking at my direction. I then get on my tip toes and kiss his lips.

Peeta turns me so that I am facing him. Without our lips breaking apart, he lifts me up on the counter next to the dough. I wrap my legs around his waist and pull him closer to me. A moan escapes his lips. I whimper at the lose of contact with his lips as he kisses my neck again and unties my apron.

I'm about to lift up his shirt when Peeta asks, "Do you want to go somewhere?"

"Where?" I look at him questionably. Where could we possibly go where no one would notice?

"Do you trust me?" he says darkly.

I can only nod and then Peeta gives me another quick kiss. He helps me off the counter and takes my hand. The thought of sneaking around in an open place excites me which is a new feeling sent through my body.

Peeta lead us into a supply closet that keeps extra utensils, flour, sugar, and a lot of other baking supplies I can't name. He quickly shuts the door and locks it.

"Won't someone find us?"

"No. Since we've won the Games, I bought extra supplies so my father wouldn't run out. No one comes in here for anything. We'll be fine." His lips violently capture mine and I push him against the closet door. I manage to untie his apron and throw it behind me. I slip off his shirt and mine follows.

Peeta's fingers slip under my bra straps and slides them down my shoulders. His lips are sucking and biting as his fingers are digging into my hips. Suddenly I remember that's where he kept kissing me at the other night. The mark he left is almost invisible and I don't want it surfacing back up.

I pull on his hair to get his attention. "Peeta," I say. I can hardly breathe. I try again. "Not there Peeta. Prim kept questioning me on it."

"Then where?" he asks. His lips travel to my shoulder. "Here or here?" he asks again as his lips travel over to my collar bone and down my in the middle of my chest. I moan in response and Peeta smiles against my skin. His breath is warm and his kisses were. Heat is flooded through me and my stomach is in knots. I know that Peeta is teasing me and I don't want him to continue. I didn't think that our first time would be in a supply closet.

"Please...," I sigh out, begging for something unnamed. Peeta travels down to my stomach and I let out a giggle. Why would I be giggling at a time like this. It's so unattractive, I think. I can't help but giggle as he continues to place kisses all over my stomach. I squirm as he lowers to the waist band of my pants. I feel his fingers tugging at the band and then the unexpected happens.

The door knob is jiggling. Someone's unlocking the door. "Dammit," I hear Peeta mumble under his breath. "I swear my brothers weren't supposed to be here today." Peeta picks up our shirts.

When we put them back on, I'm still tugging down mine and fixing my bra. Mrs. Mellark opens up the door and she's furious. I'm scared for my life and for Peeta. Five years ago I watched her hit Peeta because he burned some bread. Now that she caught us in the closer, I wonder what's going to happen to him.

"What the hell are you two doing in this closet!" Mrs. Mellark screams. "Why are you with this fucking Seam slut when you could be screwing some better girl here!" she yells while pointing a finger at me. I wanna yell back at her, but Peeta grabs my hand and this calms me.

"Don't you ever talk to Katniss that way again, mom," Peeta spits back.

"She doesn't even love you. She just sleeps with you to get to you so she'll have you wrapped around her finger and use you. She's no good for you-"

"That's enough! I will not allow you to tell me who I can love and sleep with. It's no concern of yours and I'll have you know we are greatly in love unlike you and dad." His mother'a face is full of anger and disgust. I never wanted to meet this woman after I saw what she did to him.

"What's going on in here?" Mr. Mellark asks with concern while walking into the area.

"You're son is in here fucking this no good Seam slut when he knows that we've got orders that need to go out! Oh! And their in love!" she laughs. "Can you believe that? After she treated him like crap, how much is he paying you anyways, whore? Why have him when you can have Gale Hawthorne. Everyone thought you'd end up with him, but why an idiot like my son?" She looks at him with disgust. "You could have done so much better with your life than be with this-" I cut her off. I can't hold it in anymore. I'm boiled up with so much anger towards this woman, I will not stand her torture any more.

"I am in love with your son, more than you know. He saved my life, have me hope five years ago to keep living. All you did was beat him down and treat him like shit, more even like a slave working in the bakery shop. You were right, that I'd win the Games, but I didn't make it by myself. It was Peeta, too. He has so much strength and you're too messed up to realize it and see it. He's kind and he's funny. I didn't want to think about love, but he was so perfect and I fell under his spell. You truly have a wonderful son." I can feel the tears wanting to slip out of my eyes like rain drops because of my anger toward his mother and love for Peeta. Peeta gives my hand a squeeze.

Mrs. Mellark is stunned and a smile creeps on my face. That should make her think before she says another word like that to me.

"Peeta, take your girlfriend home and take the day off." His father sends us both an apologetic look. I feel bad for Peeta, his brothers, and his father having to deal with their mom like this. It's bad enough when your mother won't take care of you like a mother should and worse when a mother beats her own children and treats them like crap.

Mr. Mellark moves his wife out of the way. She's about to say something, but Peeta shuts her up saying a threatening, "Don't."

Peeta is in front of me, guiding us out of the bakery. He grabs both of our coats and we put them on outside not wanting to be in there any longer than we need to be.

Snow is falling down, covering everything with its white flakes. We haven't said a word to each other as we walk around.

"What do we do now?" I decide to break the silence.

"We," he continues as he takes me hand and place a kiss on it, "We are going to make a kids birthday party simply the best this year. After all he's 12 today."

"Oh," is all I can manage. He's of reaping age now. Now parent wishes their child can go through the Hunger Games. We could even end up training this kid in a few months.

"We aren't going to think about that, Katniss. We are going to make this day fun as possible." It's like he just read my mind.

"How will we do that?" I ask dumbly.

"We are going to teach the kids how to make cookies and let them decorate them. I planned on doing this for them for a while now. Their parents will enjoy it too." Peeta Mellark always saving the day. "Come on," he says as he's leading us back to the bakery.

I feel sick. "We aren't going back in there, are we?" I can't stand seeing that woman whose a mother again.

"No. Don't worry. I'll just sneak in the back and bring out some supplies."

"Okay." I let out a sigh.

"I'll be right back." He gives me a kiss before he heads in.

"I love you." I've got a bad feeling about this.

"I love you too," he calls out and then he's gone.

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_**Author'a note: What's going to happen? Chapter 11 is already halfway finished. Please review; they are love. Also, it helps me update faster!**_


	11. Chapter 11

**_Author's note: I know it's kinda long. I'm sorry. I hope you all enjoy this chapter._**

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Peeta came out carrying a cardboard box with more than enough supplies. He looked like he was having a little difficultly carrying the box. He's walking a little too fast and I know something went down in the ten minutes I stood out here waiting for him. I decided to tug on his right arm which was the wrong move. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah," he grunts. "I'm fine."

"No you're not," I say tugging on his arm again and making him wince in pain on purpose. I know I should just leave it alone, but I swear...if that woman laid a hand on him...

"I slipped and fell because of my stupid leg."

"Honestly?" I know Peeta is upset about his new leg. He didn't want the Games to change him and he sees it that way. I just hope he knows he hasn't changed in my eyes.

"Honestly."

I know he's hiding something, but I see the truth in his eyes. Deep down he knows I know. I just wish he'd admit it. I look at him pleadingly, wanting the answer.

Peeta lets out a sigh. "She tried to hit me after she went on about you and I again and I dogged the hit in time, but I slipped and fell. My arm hurts a little bit. I'm fine. Just leave it alone."

"Peeta, she can't do that."

"No matter how hard my father tries there is no stopping her. Just leave it alone I said." Peeta snaps at me and I'm slightly hurt. I frown and begin walking again, but I slow down and let him catch up because I have now clue where we are going.

"Katniss," he pauses. I don't want to hear it from him.

"What?" I spit back. I stop in my tracks.

"I'm sorry." Peeta is now looking at me, his eyes hoping I accept.

"I know. I just can't stand the thought of you getting hurt by her." That's all I can manage. I can't protect him from everything. I know that. It still pains me.

"I know, sweetheart. Come here." This is the first time Peeta calls me sweetheart. It's annoying from Haymitch, but now I kind of like it coming from him. I can't help but move closer to him. He balances the box with his good arm and sneaks his injured one around my waist and kisses my forehead.

"When we get home, I want my mom to look at your arm. Promise me?"

"I promise."

I slide my right arm around his waist under his coat. I can feel the heat from his body radiating and it keeps my hand warm from the brisk, cold air. Snow is falling fast, as almost an inch has fallen. I wonder how long we are going to be over with the kids.

We reach the house of the Hawkins. They are barely a middle aged coupe. They have three children: two sons and a daughter. One son, James is nineteen who's fiancé, Lauren is over helping. Then is the daughter, Abbey, who is fifteen and then the birthday boy, Alexander, who goes by Alex. A few of his friends from school are here as well.

"Mama, Alex won't get up from his seat. He's really sad and you know why. Nothing I am saying is helping. Even his friends can't get him up and about."

"Darling, can you go talk to him? You've talked to our children before at this age." Mrs. Hawkins says. She looks at her husband pleadingly. He only sighs in response.

Mr. Hawkins is about to say something but I interrupt him. "I'll go talk to him, if that's alright with you." I know it isn't my place to do this, but I feel I might have a shot.

"You needn't to, but if you want then go ahead." Mrs. Hawkins smiles at her husband's response. Please, please let this work.

I walk into the living room and I see Alex sitting and staring down at the floor. I get down on my knees to be at his level. "Hey birthday boy. Happy birthday."

Alex doesn't even look at me as he mumbles a "thank you." I know every kid at this age isn't happy because they are eligible for the reaping. Sadness grows inside of me quickly, but I know I need to be strong for the child.

I glance back to the other room and see Peeta making small talk with the family and showing then the supplies he brought. Their faces are showing true happiness.

"Peeta is going to teach you and your buddies how to make some cookies. Do you want to go see what he brought? I think you'll like it a lot. It'll be fun."

"Why should I have fun? I'm twelve and I could die in a couple of months." He's staring at me now. At least he's looking at me and not the ground. I don't know what to say. I'm shocked at how bitter he is.

I know this isn't going to be easy. Suddenly an idea popped in my head. "Did your brother get picked?" I smile at him, trying to give him hope or peace in his mind.

Alex doesn't answer. "Did your sister get picked?" I start to tickle his stomach. I don't know why I do this. It's something I only did to Prim to cheer her up. Maybe because of fear he has like Prim once had.

Alex starts giggling uncontrollably. He's begging me to stop as he continues to laugh.

"I won't release you until you answer," I say laughing.

"No they didn't!" he nearly shouts. He panting and still laughing from the effects.

"Maybe it's because your family is one of the lucky ones. Don't dread the future, but live for what you have now in front of you. Don't be like how I was." I pat his head and give him another smile.

Alex gets up from his seat and gives me a hug. I'm stunned for a moment and then he says, "Thank you." I then return the hug. I look back over and see his father standing quietly in the doorway wondering if he is alright. I smile at him and nod my head. Mr. Hawkins then walks away with a smile on his face.

"Alex," a voice hollers from another room.

"Go on, now. Go see what's awaiting in the kitchen." He is now smiling brightly and runs off into the kitchen. I slowly follow him into the room. His friends and family are gathered around and watching Peeta prepare the area for the cookies. I see Peeta glance at me and smile. It's a weird smile and it makes me feel weird but warm inside.

There are a bunch of aprons tangled together. I help Mrs. Hawkins untangle the aprons and tie them around the seven children total. The aprons are too long for them so we hitched them up.

The young teens are watching Peeta closely. They follow his instructions carefully, afraid to do something wrong. The all laugh as Peeta "accidentally" throws flour around. Their laughter fills the room and everyone is happy. This begins a little flour food fight type thing. A couple minutes later they stop and the continue cookie making.

They make the cookies in different shapes, each one special in their own way. I can't help but notice Peeta's smile as the cookies are gently placed on the pan. His eyes are filled with happiness. I know he loves baking and watching him with the children, I know one day he will make a great father. I wonder how often he has these experiences.

Alex is opening his presents while the many pans of cookies are cooking. It isn't much, but he is happy. I know he took what I said to heart. There is still seven minutes left on the timer. The snowfall has quickly added up and the children want to go outside and play. After begging and pleading, Mr. and Mr. Hawkins finally give into the children. The children run to the door way and bundle up in their coats and gloves.

"Team up with me?" I overhear James ask Peeta with a smile.

"Sure." Peeta smiles and then yells out to the kids as they disappear outside. I can't help but worry that Peeta is going to hurt himself worse.

I decided to stay inside with Mrs. Hawkins and her future daughter-in-law. There is a huge mess of flour and cookie remnants. I help wash out the bowls and the utensils and fold up the aprons and place them back in the box.

Mrs. Hawkins and Lauren start asking me about Peeta and I. They ask if we are planning in getting married. They must believe that our relationship was real for the Games. I know what I say might bite me later so I say in the late future there might be a possibility. They only smile and then I return the question except him asking when their marriage is.

This conversation goes on and on and then they are talking about babies. I can only nod and chip in when I'm really needed. I haven't thought about this for Peeta and I. It doesn't make me uncomfortable and my mind isn't telling me like before to not have children. I'm actually wondering the thought now, if children is a possibility for us. Some families got lucky with their children that they didn't get reaped. Unlike if Peeta and I had children, they would be more valuable and would mostly likely be reaped. I shove the thought out of my head when the timer rings. I excuse myself to bring in the kids.

Mr. Hawkins opens the door. "Is it time yet? It's getting colder by the minute."

"They just came out," I assured him. "I can go out there and get them."

"Okay," he smiles at me. I can't help but feel something is about to happen. I open the door and close it. I take in the view of Peeta and James playing with the kids. Snow is flying everywhere. Children's laughter fills the empty streets.

"Now!" I hear someone yell. It's Peeta I realize. Then, snow is hitting me in the face and I regret that I should have zipped my cost shut. The kids are laughing as I'm yelping from the coldness attacking my body.

"Peeta!" I yell out and all I hear is laughter. This was planned for sure.

He is running toward me now and I quickly form a snowball and throw it at his is face. It hits neck instead. He's now in front of me and laughing and I kept help but laugh too. His hands find my neck and I shriek out and then his cold lips find mine and he kisses me quickly. I don't want this kiss to end but for the sake of the eyes watching it has to.

"The cookies are ready," I manage to say.

"Okay everyone, the cookies are ready. Let's head inside and decorate," Peeta shouts in front of me. He gives me another quick kiss and then I head inside as the children cheer.

We all head inside and set our coats and shoes by the fire so that they dry off quicker. The children run into the kitchen and Peeta helps the kids ice the cookies. About thirty minutes, more than half the cookies disappear after the children eat sandwiches.

It's almost late afternoon, early evening as James and Mr. Hawkins take the kids home to their families. Peeta and I stay until they get back to help clean up the new created messes. When they arrive back home Mr. and Mrs. Hawkins thank us for giving the kids a wonderful time.

We talk a few moments more and then we walk home. When we pass by the bakery I start to stiffen.

"Katniss, I need to head back over to the bakery before it gets any later. Go on home before it gets too late. I promise I will come to you in less than hour."

"But your arm," I know this isn't an argument I can win but it's worth a shot. I don't want it any worse.

"Nothing is going to happen to me. Don't worry. I just need to check on my dad. My mom is probably up in the house right now. Usually she cooks dinner right about now," he reassures me.

"Okay," I say. I give him a long kiss and then head home. I suddenly regret letting Peeta out of my sight, for I fear something is about to happen to him.

* * *

**_I know...a slight cliffhanger. Nothing that bad I hope. Let me know what you guys think. Reviews are like early birthday presents for me which is in 7 days._**


	12. Apologies

**_Author's note: Hi everyone. Omg I'm so sorry. I know what you must be thinking, that this is hit a crappy msg and it is. I'm sorry. _**

**_First off, I don't know if I'm supposed to do this or not, but I've seen other writers do it sI I'm doing it this one time only unless this happens again. Some have informed me that I have writers block and this is true. I've overcome it I think. This weekend starting Friday afternoon to evening I will post my next chapter and more to follow quickly until I hit my Catching Fire part which is just around the corner. School has also been stressful with a few new semester classes. I've had a birthday and serious doctor appointments with more to come. It's been discouraging as well dealing with the doc. I haven't been wanting to write but I've come up with ideas. I'm terribly sorry that I've made you fellow readers wait so long. I promise to make it up to yo. If you want, I will be happy to write something just for you. Consider it a one-shot or a what-if thing or something I can tie into a dream. Sexual (will not be so detailed!) or not. Devastating whatever. It's up to you. Just PM me. _**

**_Again i am sorry, but I am back. I promise! Updates will be regularly starting Friday! _**


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